Finding my motivation again
How I get over writer's block
Writing has been a huge struggle lately.
It's an all too familiar feeling. I get to the middle of my first draft, and I realise that I've fallen out of love with my characters and the plot. Every sentence is painstaking, and my daily word count dries up to a trickle. The voice inside my head says, "This book sucks."
Pushing through it doesn't work because my feelings stem from fundamental problems with the story. The only thing that helps is to go back to the drawing board and revise my outline, then revise my draft. More often than not, this requires extensive re-writing.
I know this process will solve my problems, yet the amount of resistance I feel is staggering. It's the sunk cost fallacy at play:
The phenomenon whereby a person is reluctant to abandon a strategy or course of action because they have invested heavily in it, even when it is clear that abandonment would be more beneficial.
-Oxford Languages
A few days ago, I finally decided to suck it up and re-outline my book. At first it was a tedious exercise, but eventually, the ideas began to flow, the pieces falling into place. And let me tell you, I feel SO MUCH BETTER now.
I have some exciting new ideas for how to progress the story. I've dropped an entire character and subplot which I hated writing, and I've finally discovered my main character's goal and a backstory which explains her behaviour.
A weight has lifted from my shoulders. I'm in love with my characters and the story again. My motivation has returned, and I can't wait to get stuck back into writing.
Even though it's heartbreaking to see so many words go down the drain, I have never regretted going back and making major revisions to improve a draft, even if it takes me much longer to finish. This is my process, and I have to trust it.